Well, life has definitely changed in the our household. Just 1 month ago, I would have told you that my kids would be graduating from homeschool with the Christian homeschooling community where we were members. Well, I guess God had completely different plans.
I truly, truly have been relying on my God and KNOWING without a doubt that He seriously works ALL things together for my good and HIS GLORY (Romans 8:28). I was also encouraged to remember that like in the life of Joseph (in the bible! Genesis 50:20), sometimes what MAN intends for evil, God intends for good.
SO STINKIN' TRUE!!!
Unfortunately, my family was involved in a hurtful situation that proved to be un-biblical in the way it was handled. It was emotional for all of us...lots of tears were involved, especially by me. I mean, seriously, I thought I HAD EVERYTHING FIGURED OUT before this happened. I knew exactly how my boys would be educated and thought it was the ONLY way for our family.
Well, after said event occurred, I couldn't sleep for days. I was confused and crying out to God for help and wisdom and comfort and peace and direction. Honestly, I just didn't know how to pray. So, in the middle of the night, with just my bible and journal in hand, I began to pray for the Holy Spirit to please intercede on my behalf (Romans 8:26-27). I felt His comfort and peace and ended that praying/crying time with the Lord with some direction. I slept after this...in His peace.
Later that morning, we had a family meeting with my awesome husband taking the lead. (Through this all, he was my protector and my family's hero...I fell even more deeply in love with him. I am so blessed!) We prayed together. We cried together. The older two boys went to their rooms to listen to God and ask Him for direction.
Together, with God's leading and guidance, we decided that the boys would start public school. WOW! Seriously...4 days before this I never thought this would even be an option in our lives. Well, never say never!
Honestly, it has almost been one month, and I finally feel like I am at a place where I can write about it. This was hard...very, very hard. However, I must tell you that I am doing great. Seriously, I cannot tell you how good I feel. I didn't realize how totally stressed-out, overwhelmed, stressed-out, uptight, un-fun, stretched, and on edge I had become. I was spiritually, emotionally, and physically drained...tapped...spent and DIDN'T EVEN KNOW IT!
Now, I am relaxed. I laugh A LOT!! I laugh so hard I cry over ridiculous things like exploding cookies during an Apples to Apples game. (You had to be there!!) I seriously don't remember laughing like that in a very, very long time. I am so much more joyful. I like me. It is good. HE IS GOOD!!!
He seriously allowed me to go through an unwanted, horrible, and hurtful situation because He knew that was the ONLY way that our family would switch its course.
Even better than all that is the fact that I have fallen in love with my sweet 5-year-old Ian again. He has been my hardest child, by far. Now, we have some time together every day where he is the "oldest" and we play and laugh and have fun!!! I actually enjoy him. I also have the necessary time to discipline him correctly and diligently. It is good. GOD IS GOOD!!!
And in case you're wondering, my boys love school. Nate is having a harder time adjusting, but he loves it.
God is good!!!! WOOOOHOOOOO!!!
Friday, March 5, 2010
homeschooling no more
Posted by Margo at 10:21 PM
Labels: family life, homeschool
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Margo,
I really enjoyed your post. So happy that God is working in your lives! (Or maybe I should say, "that you can SEE God working," cuz isn't He always at work?)
Hope school continues to go well for the boys!
I relate to what you said about your precious Ian .. I have an "Ian" too. I have to make myself take time out to sit down and play w/him, so he's not always in trouble.
God bless you, Michael, and your boys! Say hello to Mike for me.
~Amber
I enjoyed reading this and seeing how you were trusting God in your life.
I homeschool one of my children and one goes to school. I had planned to homeschool both through high school, but that was not the way it worked for our family. I can see now how God used this in our lives also.
Margo,
Thank you for sharinh your healing heart with us. I am glad that God is stretching and growing you. God can't fill a full vessel. Sometimes he has to empty us all out so he can fill us all over again with the peace that only he can give.
I so understand what you are talking about. Sometimes we have to be jarred out of our "lifestyle" to do what God wants us to do. When God has wanted me to homeschool, the temperment, the peace, the everything waas there. When it was time to change, things became uncomfortable. However, my problem-solving, I-can-over-come attitude sometimes gets in the way of the call to bow out, so God let's things get loud, push us until we break down and listen to what He wants us to do.
My husband and I made a decision this last weekend for me to stop a job I was able to do from home because it was so time-consuming, energy-consuming and I missed having all those things I need inside to love on my boys! You'd think I'd learn. I was recognizing the symptoms of a God-change approach. However, I had to get really uncomfortable to "stop." I guess it's like running a race, knowing that if you just push yourself harder, you can win, but God wants you to stop and walk away because this wasn't your race to be in at this time.
Be blessed in your time of spiritual, emotional and physical refreshing:)
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